Sometimes we have to remind ourselves to slow down and stop trying to change things and just enjoy our children or our parents the way they are. We might want them to be different, to act different, to hurry up or try harder. But, there are times we have to stop ourselves and realize it doesn't really matter if we walk a little slower or spill the milk or not know the day or the week or remember something else. At the nursing home, we occasionally see people who have not come to terms with their loved one's quickly advancing dementia. A few weeks ago, I witnessed a daughter trying in her own way to encourage her mother to try and participate in physical therapy. The mom was 100 years old and as an outside observer it sounded more like the daughter was yelling at her mother for not working harder, and in response the mom told her she didn't want to see her there anymore. At this moment I just wanted to tell the daughter to enjoy her mom for the time they have left together , and stop trying to make her into what she use to be, a person that she won't be again.
Recently, after a very long winter, it was finally a nice day and I took the boys for a walk in our quiet neighborhood. K stopped every few steps to look at the dirt, the grass, to play with the fire hydrants, to look in the street drains etc. It makes for a very slow walk. I began the walk trying to walk faster to get a little exercise into the outing, but with so many stops it was impossible, and I was getting annoyed. But why? I decided to change my mindset and enjoy the exploration through a toddler's eyes. Then we both had fun and saw new things.
Sometimes, its all in how we think, and how we feel. We often need to be the ones to change our attitudes to enjoy the moments that we are given.